Tag Archives: awesome

Late Night Insight

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Hey Everyone!  It’s me, the negligent blogger!  Sorry, I’ll bring flowers next time.

The Banks’ residence has been it’s usual hubbub of activity.  So hubbuby in fact, that I have a very exciting announcement to make.  You see, something happened in this house, for the first time in more than two years (which coincidentally, is the approximate age of my youngest).  For the first time, in over seven hundred and thirty days, I saw the very bottom of my laundry pile, and had every piece of clothing (minus the ones on bodies) cleaned, folded and tucked into newly purged drawers.

Do you know how many pieces of clothing belong to a 5-year-old, a 3-year-old and a 2-year-old?!?!  A freaking lot…that’s how many.  And they’re all so TINY!  It’s like folding 15 loads of doll clothes.  And in a household where regular activities include finger painting, face painting and baking…it’s no wonder my kids are dressed like this from time to time.

IMG_3100

Yeah, if you’re looking for me I’ll be over in Proudofmyselfsville.

So anyway…among the many things that have happened, the thing I am about to try to capture took place as well.  And as soon as it did, I thought, I gots to go put that there on that old blog I gots there.

So here it is… Continue reading →

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Fruity Crumble Bars of Amazingness

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Okay.  So once upon a time there was this blog called F-Words and let me just tell you…it was a fantastic food blog.  Yeah…remember when I used to post recipes on here?  I’m not sure what happened bake stand but it could have something to do with the bake stand fact that I haven’t been feeling too inspired since the bake stand lately.  But either way, I felt inspired yesterday because I quit the bake stand and made these delicious little bars AND I remembered to take a picture because I’m not preoccupied by the bake stand.

I feel like I need to get something off my chest I hated doing the bake stand, but I just can’t think of what it was.

…and I ain’t talkin’ ’bout no peanut butter cookies.

Oh, now I remember.  I HATED DOING THE BAKE STAND!  I’d do my day with the kids (I have three kids under four – it’s not exactly a walk in the park – unless we go for a walk in the park that day, then I suppose it is exactly a walk in the park, but you get what I’m driving at here), then I spent EVERY NIGHT alternating between baking and BEGGING for sleep.  Then at the end of all that, I got to stand there, at the market, and watch all of my hard work melt in the sweltering heat, sweating like a fiend.  Then the icing on the cake (pun intended) was that I ended up making a cool $30 profit every week.  I know, it sounds spectacular, but it wasn’t.

I actually ended up going to a therapy session because of the stress of it all (combined with the financial horror that is my bank account), where my therapist said, “But you can bake in the day time can’t you?”  And I was frankly, just too stunned to answer.  I finally said, “A greater woman than myself could probably do it, but I’d end up putting a kid in the oven or making some other horrifying mistake.”  I started going into this huge defensive rant, then realized, this woman has no idea what the f*@k goes on in my house so maybe I should I rethink this whole asking her to therapize my BRAIN thing?!?!?!

Anyway…I have another appointment in 2 weeks.

Back to the bars.  Hey, that sounds like a movie or something.

Back to the Bars – The Lora Banks Story.  A chilling tale of a mother gone mad, searching for meaning in life in the bottom of every whiskey sour she can find in this 3 bar town.

Okay for real, back to the bars.

Continue reading →

California Salad (Dude)

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What’s up brah?  I was chillin’ at Loblaws the other day and was totally stoked to peep this bitchin’ salad, so I hopped on my longboard and was totally hot-doggin’ it to the homestead to make my own.  Yeah…I know it’s totally bogus to snake someone else’s recipe, but since this recipe belongs to the man, I thought to myself, “Relax dude…it’s yours for the taking.”

Anyway, in English (and Less-Annoying), I saw this salad called a California Salad, so I went home and made my own.

It’s delicious. It’s beautiful.  And like most things in my life, it looks like it’s a lot more work than it is.  So if you’re having guests over, it’s a great salad to make, because it looks like you slaved away, when really it takes about 10 minutes to throw together.  (Sorry to shatter the illusion Heidi and Gord).

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Coconut Mango Cake

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Okay.  I don’t want this post to be clouded by your self-loathing for never having thought of this yourself.  After a few days of major soul searching, I have come to terms with it myself, and suggest you do the same.  So let’s begin with a little self-affirmation.  Repeat after me:

“I can’t think of everything.  I am human, and humans are erred by nature.  Everyone has different talents, thinking of the most genius thing EVER is not one of mine, and that, is okay.  I forgive myself.”

Do not move on to the following sentence without having a full sense of peace.  Take a deep breath, and read the following GENIUS two words.

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Chewy Ginger Cookies

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These cookies are a staple in our kitchen.  It’s just one of those recipes, where you always seem to have everything on hand, and they’re always, ALWAYS good.

I got the recipe from AllRecipes.com and they are absolutely delish.  Like, maybe, you make them when no one is home, then open all the windows and air the house out so no one knows you made them thus you can keep them all to yourself kind of delish.

The best part though, is the texture.  They have a bit of a crunch on the outside, and they are soooo chewy in the middle.  And they stay chewy in the middle, for like, a long time.  As long as they can last without being devoured anyway.

So you make your batter, then make little cookie batter balls, roll them in sugar, pop them in the oven and they come out looking like this.

If you know me at all, you’ll know I chose that picture in particular, because it looks like a bum.  Anyway, then they flatten out a little and they look like this…

Then, your pickiest eater takes a bite of one and it looks like this…

SOLD! By the 4-foot hipster with a grin!

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OMG Brownies

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I made a terrible discovery today.  And while every fiber of my barely intact sense of morality is telling me to save you from it, I have decided to share this unspeakable truth with you.  It is so evil, I dare not say it’s name.  So I will share only it’s ruthless, devastating image.  Brace yourself.

I mean seriously.  How is a gal like me, going to run into a delicacy of this scale, and turn my head.  Walk on by.  Pretend I didn’t see it eyeing me.  It practically asked for my number.  (For the record, I would have given it.)  Anyway, I don’t know if they’re from Heaven or Hell, but I know precisely where they’re headed…straight into my favourite brownie recipe.

I’ve been meaning to share this one with you for a while, but I try not to make these brownies too often, because it’s impossible to have just one.  I have calculated them on a calorie counter, and they tap out at about 273 calories a peice.  But sirs and ma’ams, I kid you not, they are the most scrumptious 273 calories you may ever eat.

Since I just anti-sold them with that last comment, I think it’s picture time.

They have that crunchy top, and the gooiest middle, then with those peanut butter melts…O…M…G.  There’s not other way of putting it.

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And Brobee takes another one for the team…

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You recognize that face.  The one that you had the day your mom dressed you in that horrible outfit, when terrified, you stepped into the school yard trying to act like you “owned it.”  “What guys?  I love pink tank tops and cuffed hammer pants.  This look is HUGE in high school.”

Thanks Brobee, you always put the “F” in Fashion Victim.

Lora

Vancouver Peeps: Check This Shop Out!

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I will full on admit it.  I’m totally biased.  But I don’t care.  I don’t care if the journalist police hunt me down and throw me in prison for it.  Because it’s worth it.

My friend Andrea opened up a new bakery/coffee shop in Burnaby and it is, without a doubt, the best place you haven’t been.  I’ve had Andrea’s baking before and I will tell you this: I’d go so far as to say it’s “to die for,” except that I HATE that phrase, and really, you wouldn’t want to risk dying because you’d never be able to try any of her delectable deliciousness again.  So instead I’ll say it’s to LIVE for.

Also, handling the cafe end of things is my sister Christa.  Say hi when you go in!  You’ll know it’s her because she’ll probably be the one making a fart sound.

Here’s a picture of the gals so you know what you’re getting into before you go.

Andrea’s is the one cutting the BRAIN CAKE she MADE, and Christa is the one laughing her head off.  (Note: Andrea is not actually a cow girl – although should probably consider becoming one because she wears it so well.)

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AMAZING Espresso Buttercream

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Okay.

So, I was charged with making cupcakes for my cousin’s baby shower.  Intimidating?  A little.  But to add to it, my cousin and our friend who was also in attendance, are my weight-loss buddies.  If you’re going to ask someone who you’re supposed to be supporting, to vacate their diet for ANY reason, it better be a damn delicious reason.  So I had to come up with something really good.

I did.

Alright…busted.  These are not the ACTUAL cupcakes I made for the shower…but there was a rush, I tell ya, yeah, a real rush, and I was late, and in the kerfuffle I forgot to take a picture.  Have you ever taken a picture in a kerfuffle?  It’s not easy, so lay off man.   I made chocolate cupcakes for the shower, so use your brain and imagine your own damn picture.  Hmpf. Continue reading →

Peanut Butter Snookies

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I don’t know how often you eat peanut butter cookies, but there is about to be a sharp incline on your PBC consumption.  Here’s why.

They are sooooo good.  And so bad!  Like self-control-out-the-window bad.  And it is with that spirit of pure indulgence that I have decided to name them Peanut Butter Snookies, after everyone’s favourite mom-to-be, Snooki.

A lack of restraint is not the only thing they have in common. Continue reading →